Opening Game
Better or Worse?
This is a simple icebreaker to help your group relax and get talking. It works best with groups sitting in a circle. You’ll be reading out fun or silly situations and asking youth to respond with whether they think it’s “better” or “worse” than the one before. It gets people laughing and thinking about how quickly we compare things—even when it doesn’t really matter.
Start by giving a funny or random situation, like “Stepping in gum.” The next person must say if their situation is “better” or “worse” than that. For example, they might say “Losing a sock in the laundry—better.” Keep going around the circle, letting each person come up with a new comparison. You can also prepare a list of situations ahead of time if the group needs help thinking of examples.
Sample Situations to Get Started:
- Getting rained on without an umbrella
- Dropping your phone
- Eating cold pizza
- Forgetting your homework
- Waking up late
- Tripping in front of people
- Getting a surprise day off school
Follow-Up Questions for the Group:
Why do you think it’s so easy to compare everything—even silly stuff?
Do you think people compare more for fun or out of habit?
How does this kind of comparing show up in real life?
That was fun—and kind of silly! But think about how quickly we jumped into comparing. Is this better? Is that worse? We do it all the time without even realizing it. It’s part of how we talk, how we think, and sometimes even how we see ourselves and others.
Now imagine how often we do this in more serious ways. We might compare grades, clothes, looks, friends, talents—even faith. Sometimes we feel like we’re not good enough. Other times, we feel like we’re better than someone else. Either way, comparing can mess with our hearts.
Jesus knew this, and He told a story about two people who went to pray. One man compared himself to others. The other man didn’t. Let’s listen to that story now and see what Jesus wants us to learn about comparing, prayer, and how God really sees us.
Scripture Reading
Read Luke 18:9-14 (A Pharisee Compares Himself to a Tax Collector), the Gospel for the 30th Sunday in Ordinary Time Year C
Jesus addressed this parable to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else.
“Two people went up to the temple area to pray; one was a Pharisee and the other was a tax collector.
The Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself, ‘O God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of humanity — greedy, dishonest, adulterous — or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.’
But the tax collector stood off at a distance and would not even raise his eyes to heaven but beat his breast and prayed, ‘O God, be merciful to me a sinner.’
I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former; for whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”
Discussion
Let’s take a closer look at the story Jesus told in Luke 18:9-14. It might seem simple, but it speaks directly to something we all face—comparing ourselves to others. Jesus told this parable for a reason. He wanted to help people understand how dangerous it is to think we’re better than someone else. He also wanted to show how much God values honesty and humility.
Think about the Pharisee in this story. He stood up and prayed out loud about how great he was. He listed all the good things he did—fasting, giving money, following the rules. But then he did something worse. He said, “Thank you, God, that I’m not like other people,” and even pointed to the tax collector as an example. He was using his prayer to brag. He wasn’t really talking to God with a humble heart. He was trying to look good.
Now think about the tax collector. He didn’t even look up. He stood far off and said only one thing: “God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” That was it. No big speech. No comparing. Just a simple, honest prayer. And Jesus says that he is the one who went home “justified.” That means he was made right with God. He wasn’t perfect, but he was honest.
Let’s talk about comparing. Why do you think it’s so easy to fall into that trap? Maybe you’ve looked at someone else and thought, “At least I’m not like that person.” Or maybe you’ve felt bad because someone else seems smarter, more popular, better-looking, or more talented. Comparison goes both ways. It can make us feel proud, or it can make us feel like we’re not good enough.
Can you think of a time when you felt better than someone else? What was going on in your heart at that moment? Or maybe think about a time when you felt worse than someone else. How did that feel? Most of the time, comparing just makes us feel empty inside. It doesn’t bring us closer to God. It doesn’t help us love others better. It just creates space for pride, jealousy, and sadness.
The Pharisee focused on other people’s sins. He didn’t look at his own heart. The tax collector did the opposite. He wasn’t thinking about other people at all. He knew he needed God’s mercy, and that’s what he asked for. That’s what made the difference.
God doesn’t want us to pretend to be something we’re not. He doesn’t want us to brag about how good we are. He just wants us to come to Him as we are. He already knows everything about us. What He’s really looking for is honesty and humility.
Also, remember this: your relationship with God is personal. It’s not a contest. It’s not about being better than the person next to you. You don’t have to pray like someone else. You don’t have to have the same gifts as someone else. God made you unique. He’s walking with you on your own path.
So what does this parable teach us about how God sees us? It shows us that He values the heart more than actions done to impress others. He wants us to be real with Him. When we admit we need Him, when we stop pretending, that’s when we grow closer to Him.
Take a moment to think: Are there times when you compare yourself to others in prayer, at school, on social media, or even at church? What would it look like to stop that habit and just be yourself before God?
This story is an invitation. Jesus is telling us, “Come to Me as you are. Don’t worry about being better than anyone else. Just be honest. Just be humble. I will meet you there.”
Small Group Reflection Questions
When you break into small groups, remind the youth that this is a space to listen and share respectfully. They don’t need to have the perfect answer. The goal is to reflect together and be honest. Encourage them not to interrupt and to give everyone a chance to speak. Let them know it’s okay to pass if they’re not ready to talk.
- What part of the story stood out to you the most? Why?
- Have you ever felt like the Pharisee in this story—thinking you were better than someone else?
- Have you ever felt like the tax collector—feeling ashamed or unworthy?
- Why do you think it’s hard to stop comparing ourselves to others?
- Where do you see comparison happening most often in your life?
- How does comparing yourself to others affect your relationship with God?
- How would it feel to let go of comparison and focus just on your own walk with God?
- What do you think it means to pray with honesty?
- What are some ways we can practice humility in our daily lives?
- How can we help each other grow in faith without comparing ourselves?
Challenge
This week, pay attention to the moments when you compare yourself to someone else. It might happen when you’re scrolling through social media, sitting in class, playing sports, or even during church. When you catch yourself thinking things like “I wish I was like them” or “At least I’m better than that person,” stop and say this simple prayer: “God, help me see myself and others through your eyes.” This short prayer is a way to invite God into your thoughts and help shift your focus from comparison to truth.
After you pray, try to thank God for one good thing in your own life. It could be something small or something big. Just focus on what God is doing in you—not in anyone else. This helps build a grateful heart instead of one filled with jealousy or pride. The more you practice this, the more peace you’ll feel, and the closer you’ll grow to God.
Prayer
Let’s take a moment to quiet our hearts and pray together. You can close your eyes if that helps you focus. Take a deep breath and remember that God is with us right now, listening with love.
Jesus, you see our hearts. You know our thoughts, our struggles, and our hopes. You love us just as we are—no matter what we’ve done, no matter how we feel.
Help us to stop comparing ourselves to others. Remind us that we don’t have to be like anyone else to be loved by you. You made each of us on purpose, and you are walking with us every step of the way.
Teach us to be humble. Help us to admit when we need you. Show us how to look at ourselves with honesty, and not to pretend we have it all together.
Help us to be honest in our prayers, like the tax collector in the story. We don’t need fancy words or perfect lives. We just need open hearts.
Jesus, help us to trust in your mercy. When we fall, help us get back up. When we feel weak, be our strength. When we feel unworthy, remind us of your love.
Thank you for hearing our prayers. Thank you for seeing the real us—and loving us anyway.
Amen.
More Resources
For more information, see https://young-catholics.com/82000/why-comparing-is-dangerous-lesson-plan-luke-18/